Monday, May 30, 2005

FAITH IS HERE!!!!

Faith arrived today at 10:06 am at 3 lbs 15oz and 16 1/3 inches long.

Her and mommy are doing great...I'll update you more when I'm not about to fall asleep.

Thanks for all the emails/comments with all the support.

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Update#3

It's official, she will be there until the baby is born. The doctor will start giving her the steroids today and that last for 48 hours, then they will wait another 48 before deciding when they might take the munchkin. The baby is doing great, and mommy's only symtpom is a migraine.

I'll let you know when I hear more.

Friday, May 27, 2005

Update #2

Well, she's still in the hospital while they try a figure out what's wrong with her. They still have her on some good drugs to make the migraine go away so she can sleep.

They did a cat scan this morning, and aside from slight case of insanity, everything was normal.

So now we are hoping that tomorrow she will get to come home, but we are thinking it won't be until about 3 days after the baby is born.

Thanks for all of your comments, I have been relaying the messages to her.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Greetings from the Hospital (via her hubby)

Well this is notasoccermom's husband R. She was admitted to the hospital today after fainting in the bathroom. All of her blood work came out stable and so did the damn 24hour tests. She has a migraine, but other than that is doing well. As of right now, they are only keeping her overnight and hopefully she can come back home tomorrow. The baby is fine and kicking more than ever, especially when the monitors are on.

I'll keep you updated on everything until she comes back home.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

My Still Waters

A year ago this week we lost Emma. We don't know how long she had been gone when they did the ultrasound, but it couldn't have been too long because her tiny body still looked perfect on that screen. She was perfect. Except she no longer had a heartbeat. Last week I asked Randy if ever thought about her. I was surprised when he said everyday. I've come to learn that still waters run deep, my friends. I don't think I will ever be able to explain how much it changed both Randy and I. It was all so sad and our marriage took a hit. I had never seen my husband cry before that day. Even then I just saw him tear up from across the room. That killed me in ways that I will never be able to express. We talked about it and we weren't mad at eachother or God. But secretly, I was pissed. I blamed myself. I blamed God. I blamed everything I could think of but never said anything outloud. Looking at Grace broke my heart. I was forced to stay pregnant for a week after we knew she was gone. The Dr had hoped that my body would go into labor on it's own. If It did,I was instructed to come to the ER so they could "take care of it". That didn't happen and I had a D&C a week later. We chose to donate her body to science in hopes she could help someone else. I still remember telling her goodbye as I was waiting for them to roll me off to surgery.
I was broken and depressed. I was upset that Randy wasn't as sad as me - that he wasn't dying inside when I was. I quit Hospice - I couldn't help people in their grieving when I couldn't even help myself.
It took me months to realize that my husband was a much stronger man than I gave him credit for. He held shit together because I couldn't. I felt alone. It was the only time I tried to picture my life without him. There was no communication there anymore. I think that was more on my part. I didn't want to talk. I was able to put on a nice show most of the time, though.That lasted for 3 months. Then one night it all changed. It started with a kiss. The next thing you know, I'm lying in bed pouring my heart out and crying. I felt connected to him for the 1st time since we lost her. We both got things on track that night. I think thats when I let it all go. All the blame and the hurt was gone. I looked for brighter skies and haven't turned back. WE started trying to get pregnant again.
I still think about Emma everyday. I think she watches over us. On her due date we saw Faith's little heartbeat for the 1st time. I took it as a good sign. I don't know what else to say. I still have bad days, but they aren't as frequent. I still can't listen to this song without thinking of Emma or tearing up.

SEETHER "Broken (feat. Amy Lee)"
I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph and I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
You've gone away, you don't feel me, anymore
The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain...............................



I haven't taken down her ultrasound picture and I don't plan to. She was my child. She was very much wanted and loved. She still is. I find peace in knowing that shes with God, her Pa(Randy's Dad) and my Grandparents. I know she's being well cared for. I also know that she has 2 friends, Miranda and Gabe, to play with( I was not the only one to lose a baby. We had 2 friends that lost their babies late in pregnancy).

We will always love and miss her. Her sister's will know of her. She will not be forgotten.

I thank God for letting me get through it all in one piece, eventhough at times I was in pieces. I also thank him for the still waters that helped me stay afloat.

Time for some funny

Since I've become bored with life in general I thought I would tell you all a very funny and embarrassing story. It was not one of my finer moments, but it happened. Keep in mind that I'm not proud.

Embarrassing Story #1

About a year and a half ago I was still working in Hospice, but was also helping another department. This department was called Lifeline. They have the little buttons that the elderly can wear around their neck. In case they've fallen and they can't get up all they have to do is hit that button and help is on the way. Anyway, I was helping at a Sr. lucheon/presentation about an hour away that day. I was STARVING. I was really trying to stick with my weight watchers plan and be good. I don't remember what all was served, but I know that I had a lot of broccoli and some spinach. On the ride back to the office I noticed the familiar rumblings of what would be a masive poo. Once I was back to the office parking lot I said good bye to the guy I rode with and hopped in my car and started to drive home. I didn't want to drop a duce in the work restroom and I only lived 7 minutes away. This was a BIG NASTY MISTAKE.

As soon as I pulled out of the parking lot I knew I had screwed up, but I couldn't turn back. Within 2 minutes I was hopping up and down in the drivers seat. I will swear to this day that it was the worst pain I have EVER felt in all of my life. NO JOKE. Then I look ahead to see that traffic isn't moving at all - There's a 3 car pile up. SHIT! Literally. I'm crying at this point. The pain is undescribable. I'm kinda freaking out. My poo is starting to play turtle( slowly sticking it's head in and out). I don't know what to do. So, I decided that I'd just let a little out. But the little felt so good that it all came out and I couldn't stop it. And it wasn't what you would call solid................

45 minutes later I pulled up in front of our apartment and realized that not only had I just shit myself, but I was wearing WHITE scrub pants that day. We lived on the 3rd floor. I made a mad dash up those stairs, praying that no one would come out and see me. No such luck. Just as I was sticking my key in the hole I heard my neighbor aross the hall come out. I turned around as fast as I could and exchanged the regular hello's and waited until he was out of sight. I flew in our apartment and headed right to the shower where I stripped off my work scrubs. All I can say is it was disgusting.

30 minutes later, once I had started the washing machine, I called my husband to thank him for letting me drive his car that day. I did end up telling him later that night while we were at bowling. His best friend, Brian laughed so hard he cried. I was nicknamed "poop stain" from there on out.

And if this wasn't all bad enough - It happened again 7 months later. I had broccoli for lunch that day and got stuck behind a train. It wasn't as bad this time. We no longer lived in our apartment and I was driving my car.......My new car that still had the intransit stickers. Karma is a bitch.

My husband's rule now is that I can not eat broccoli if I plan on being in a car or not near a bathroom for 2 hrs afterwards. It's a good rule. Just Sunday at my brother's graduation party, I told my mom that the veggie tray was low and she needed some more broccoli. My husband yells at her from the other room, "NO YOU DON'T"

Have I ever mentioned how much I love that man.

Well, I hope you had a good laugh. I have more embarrassing stories, but that will have to wait.

Monday, May 23, 2005

How sad is it......

......That I keep praying that Merry Maids will fly out of ass and I'll have a clean house someday soon?

...........I've been craving liquor for the last week( Thanks K!) ?

...........I broke out with the song PRAY by MC Hammer last night while folding laundry?

............That I never forward those emails I get 6 times a day that say if I don't pass them along that Jesus won't love me and I will be broke and everyone will die... Should I really fuck with karma like that?

..........That I tripped over the baby gate tonight and Randy MADE me call our Dr b/c I fell on my tummy........and she laughed at me? ( I explained I was fine, but HE made me call....my hand braced my fall. She told him thank you for being pushy).

.........That I'm sooooo bored I wish I was at work....at work for christ sakes.....thats bored.

.........I think that Grace and Xavier plot against us?( X is my 2 yr old nephew in case you didn't know or are new)

........I keep thinking about how much I don't care for Linda the Biker Mama who can't draw my blood for shit? I need to get over it.

May I please go and drink a tall glass of SHUT THE FUCK UP now?

Todays labs showed that I'm still stable. If I'm stable then I want to go back to work. I'm gonna be broke here any day now. WHINE WHINE WHINE WHINE WHINE WHINE. It's never ending. Larry, the pathologist, has been gone for the last 2 weeks and I'm really starting to miss him. Linda,the biker mama, has been taking my blood in his place and I now look like a fucking drug addict. She can never get me in one stick. THEN, once she stuck me and lost the vain she took off her glove and STUCK HER FINGER IN MY BLOOD TO TRY TO FIND IT AGAIN....and then stuck me in the same spot. IDIOT!! Pretty sure thats on the "do not do" list.
LARRY, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU ???????

People, I'm fucking crabby. My mojo has yet to be found. I'm annoying myself. I didn't know that was possible. I guess you learn something new everyday.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

The weekend

Well, it's Sunday night now and all the fun is over. We took Grace to her 1st parade yesterday and she had a blast. She got sunburned on her feet because I suck with sunscreen. It doesn't seem to be bothering her at all. Randy and I got fried to a crisp. We're dumbasses. We thought we'd be ok sitting in the shade, but we weren't. Oh well.
Today was my youngest brother's graduation party. It was kinda sad since it was all family and friends of my parents. The only friend he had there was his new girlfriend. She didn't make a great first impression on me, but then again it could just be that she was nervous. I'm pretty sure I would never ask my new boyfriend's very pregnant sister how she could miss a target so big (meaning my mouth) when she's eating broccoli and drops a piece covered in ranch all over her shirt. Could just be me though. I was nice and just smiled. She's lucky I'm pregnant and wasn't drinking like everyone else. I kept my mouth shut (once I got the broccoli in) and smiled.
So now I'm officially ready to be done with this pregnancy. This weekend kicked my ass. Remember how I said I was tired of whining? Yeah, well I lied. I'm a big fat liar.
We'll see how tomorrow's Dr appt goes.

Friday, May 20, 2005

Weird yet Interesting Facts About ME

Here are some odd things about me that I thought I'd share:

I loved High School - I was friends with everyone

I am a Walmart shopper - They fit my budget.

I love to walk around Target - it helps calm me

I am not a " girly girl" - I live in jeans and t-shirts

I have never watched Desperate Housewives, The Amazing Race, Survivor, or American Idol.
My Favorite shows are The L word, Queer as Foke, The Family Guy, South Park, Dead Like Me, Six Feet Under, COPS and Dr Phil

I own 7 pairs of shoes, but only wear 3 or them - like I said, not a girly girl.

I miss my oldest baby brother everyday - eventhough he forgets he has a sister.

I constantly worry about my kids growing up in this crazy world- how do I teach them that it's more important to be pretty on the inside( that means be nice) than on the outside ??
* Don't get me wrong - My daughter is beautiful

I didn't know that parents actually liked their kids unitl I had one of my own- thats not ment to be a knock on my parents - I know they did the best they could.

I'm almost 27 years old and am still afraid of disappointing my parents. Sometimes, I'm actually scared of what they'll say to me.

I wanted Grace to be a Daddy's girl because I never was. Man, did that plan backfire on me - Her Daddy does no wrong. Mommy is the evil one.

I told Randy that he didn't get to hold Baby Faith 1st, since I let him hold Grace 1st. Secretly, I do plan on letting him hold her 1st. DON'T TELL HIM!

My husband is the bestest friend I've ever had.

I knew I was going to marry Randy in 1999. He didn't know unitl 2003. I thought I was just a liitle " off" So I got engaged to someone else.

Randy was supposed to be a groomsmen in my wedding to this other person.

My ex is now living with my my maid of honor from that wedding that never happened.

I have no hard feelings whatsoever. It was a win win situation.

I believe that everthing happens for a reason - I did have a hard time with that when we lost Emma.

I try really hard to be a good person and not such a snarky bitch - I fail a lot.

Blah, blah, blah

So I decided that I'm done with the " I'm pregnant and I shall whine" bullshit. It's all too fucking depressing. I've decided that I will try to get my funny mojo back this weekend somehow, someway. Besides, this will be a VERY GOOD WEEKEND!! Tomorrow is a parade. It will be Grace's first. I'm so excited for her. My parents used to take us when we were little and I looked forward to it all year. Crazy Aunt's oldest daughter is going to be in it with her cheerleading squad and I can't wait to see her!! She's so fucking cute. Afterwards, we might go to the carnivale thats in a near by park. We'll see. I'm luck Randy is letting me go at all so I won't press my luck.
Sunday is my youngest brother, Mike's, graduation party. That means lots of food that I didn't have to cook. I'm thinking I might even go to the store and get his a mushy sisterly hallmark card to go with the one we already got him. That will shock the shit out of my parents, since they think I'm the world's worst sister when it comes to that kid. Let me sum it up for you - WE NOT DO GET ALONG. So, I guess I can make an effort. I still think he's a spoiled brat.
Today has started out pretty good too. The demon child that took the place of my daughter yesterday has left and it's good ol' Grace again. Crazy Aunt called to let me know that Rob Thomas was on TODAY this morning. He's sooooo sexy. And I actually feel ok. So it a good start for the weekend.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Well, I passed all of todays labs which means I'm in the clear for the weekend!

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Same shit different day

I have nothing fun to write about because things here are the same. We haven't tried to " re-do" anything, because I'm too tired. Last night we crawled into bed and Randy cuddled up next to me and put his arm around me and whispered " I love you", and thats the last thing I remember. Have I ever mentioned how much I LOVE that man? Well, I do. I coudn't live without him. Seriously.
Now, I'm in the mist of yet another 24 hr urine test, so I know tonight is out. Randy has the " no swimmers" rule. Like I said , he's a chickenshit.....Oh well.
Nothing much has really been going on here. The only thing that ever happens is that my SIL and Nephew have been over a few times. We've been watching him when she has class at night. That kid is too fuckin' cute. He looks so much like his Daddy that it's not even funny. He and Grace keep each other busy. Grace is a bully. Xavier just looks at her and says " Gracie, noooooooo". He's too funny. When they're being extra loud I tell them both how I plan on beating them ( keep your panties on - it's a joke) he looks at me with his sweet little face and says " you no beat me" and smiles. Ahhhhhhh. Makes me want a son someday. If not, well,I always have him. Lets see what else...hmmmmm.... I did get to talk to my baby brother who is overseas the other day. However, it was only for 30 seconds because I start crying like a baby when he tells me he loves me and misses me. He's an asshole.
Other than that I have nothing fun to report. I DID watch the new Britney and Kevin show last night. Ummmmm, yeah. Well it was better than their appereance on Ellen yesterday afternoon.


Well, sorry this isn't as funny as it should be. I've got nothing, kids. I'm very boring.
I gotta go pee in a hat

Annie, out

THE PEACE OF WILD THINGS

When despair for the world grows in me and I wake in the night at the least soundin fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,I go and lie down where the wood drakerests in his beauty on the water, and the great The Peace of Wild Thingsheron feeds.I come into the peace of wild things who do not tax their lives with forethoughtof grief. I come into the presence of still water.And I feel above me the day-blind starswaiting with their light. For a timeI rest in the grace of the world, and am free.
— Wendell Berry


Last night I made Randy have a conversation with me that I know he would have rather not have had. We talked about death. A subject that he avoids like the plague. We have had this talk and it always goes the same way. Short answers to my question and no eye contact. Now, before you all go thinking I'm crazy, just hear me out. I used to work in Hospice. I've seen what happens when people have no idea what their love ones want and don't want to ask. Then it's too late and they're left to figure it out by themselves. I would never wish that on my husband. I also was VERY sick when I had Grace. At the time I couldn't figure out why and the hell no one would leave the hospital. Anyways, I just want to make sure my wishes are known in case anything would ever happen. I want to know his as well. We've tackled the life insurrance topic about 900 times now. All my doing. I just need to know that my family would be taken care of. And they will be. But we've never talked about where we wanted to be buried. If we are older and I kick the bucket - I don't care. Put me in the backyard. I just want to be next to Randy at some point( I've always told him I have to go first because I just CAN'T live without him). But if I'm younger and something happens I want to be buried with the rest of my family. I want him to go on with his life and remarry - my girls will need a mom. I'll be in heaven taking care of our baby Emma and hitting the Casinos with my Grandmothers and drinkin' some beer with my father in law, so move on. He wants to be buried in Texas, with his family. And I hope he would remarry. Besides, 3 is a crowd. I know he HATES when I make him talk about that stuff, but I think it's better to be safe than sorry. What do you guys think? Am I a freak for pushing the subject? Isn't it better to be safe than sorry? Is it really that bad that I find peace of mind in this?
p.s. DO YOUR LOVED ONES KNOW IF YOU'RE AN ORGAN DONOR????

Monday, May 16, 2005

The Monday Smackdown and some talk about SEX

This mornings Dr. Appt went ok. They found more protein in my urine once again.SOOOOO guess what I get to do 2 times a week. Just guess.....Give up???
I GET TO DO 24 HOUR URINE TESTS THE DAYS BEFORE MY APPTS
Let me tell you how fucking thrilled I am about this..REALLY, I AM.
FUCK
I hate those things.
Everything else looks good. Waiting for todays lab results to see if I get " the call". I would really like to put this off at least another week. My youngest brother is graduating from high school and I would like to have more things done around here before I go in. ALSO I am now off of pelvic rest and would like to re-do what we did last night. God Bless Randy. That man must be a saint for putting up with me sometimes. I wanted to " knock it out" on Saturday, but since I was in the middle of one of my many 24 hour tests he said no. HE SAID NO!!!! Cocktart. He didn't want them to find any of his "swimmers" in my urine. Chickenshit. I was actually really pissed and went went to watch TV in the Living Room. You know, teach him a lesson for telling me no. We NEVER tell eachother no. EVER! So, whatever- he won. So Last night rolls around and he's in the mood and I'm not. I'm really freaked out about maybe having this little girl at around 30 weeks. Grace was 32 weeks and that I can handle, but not 30. I'm a freak. Anyways, totally not in the mood at all and he was OK with that. But then I lay there thinking about how much I've been bitching about getting laid and I just said no. So I Cowboy-ed the fuck up and we got to it. I however, did not give it my all. This is why I need a re-do.
Now, don't get me wrong - It was all good. We've never had that problem... I just think I could do better. We'll see...... I'll keep you updated...Yes, you're welcome
P.S. Sorry to my brother who reads this



UPDATE: labs came back and I lost platelets yet again, but not enough to have to check in. WOOOOHOOO

Sunday, May 15, 2005

Call me Captain Fatass

I decided that if this could be my last weekend of freedom then I needed to get some shit done. Which means that yes, I broke house arrest again. Just as I was getting in the car to leave I heard RRRRIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPPPP.
Yeah
I busted out the ass of my XL maternity jeans I bought 2 months ago
You may all now call me Captain Fatass.
And no. I didn't go change. I tied a sweatshirt around my ass.
Like I said - I'm lazy

Friday, May 13, 2005

Our "Walk with Jesus Talk"

Hello there, kids! It's nice to see you. Whats even better is that I'm still at home.WOOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!! For now anyway. We've now been bumped up to 2 appts a week with labs done every time. I even get to do another 24 hour urine test starting tomorrow. If I never have to handle my own urine again after this pregnancy, I won't be sad. Seriously, I won't.
So heres what the Dr said today.
DR: Your body sucks at pregnancy, Annie
Me: No shit. Tell me something I didn't know, Sherlock Holmes.
.............Ok, not really.
What she really said was that if todays labs showed my platelets are still dropping that I'd be admitted and they were going to start the steroid shots and get me delivered. Ok , I'm 29 weeks today. Color my happy ass a little freaked out. BUT we passed that lab. Platelets went up. I don't know how that happens, but I don't care at this point. I bought us at least 3 days. We'll see where we stand after the 24 hr urine test and Monday's labs. She would like to keep me pregnant unitl 32 weeks, but it's all up to the labs. Stupid Body- you suck.

On a brighter note, I got to see Brian and Kelly's babies and OMG- Too cute. I sat there and cried. They are so beautiful. I'm so happy for them. They've waited so long and gone through so much to get those girls. They're going to be in the NICU for awhile. We know that we'll probably be there at some point with them as well. I just hope it's not in a week.

As a side note, I'd just like to share how very sick and fucking tired I am of pelvic rest. Really. If I don't get to have headboard banging monkey sex soon, I'm gonna end up hurting someone. And if Randy doesn't stop wearing those "come fuck me jeans", I'll kill him and hide his sexy little body.
By the way, is it just me or should a man NOT wine to his pregnant wife that his size 32 pants are" a little tight"? I'm retaining a fucking ocean, buddy. Let me tell you about pants being tight.

I love you all

Annie, Out

Thursday, May 12, 2005

UPDATES

Many things to tell you and none of them go in order
*Next Dr. Appt tomorrow @ 1:30pm. We are seriously going to have a "Walk with Jesus" talk. I'm very tired of feeling like I've been hit by that Semi thats parked in front of my house( and yes, that asshole is back again)
* Labs from last Friday show that, once again, theres more protein in my urine than the week before and that I lost 4,000 platelets in that week as well. What does this mean!?!?! See why we need to have the "talk"
*I'm more than annoyed with the the neighbors new dog that won't stop barking.
* I feel like a asshole for not liking a dog.
*Grace is finally getting used to her new " Big girl bed" and hasn't tried to get in the crib in over 24 hours.
* I actually thought of cutting/trimming/shaving off/waxing my husbands eyebrows in his sleep yesterday.
* Once again, feeling like an asshole.
* Was told by more than one person to have my bags packed because I might get admitted tomorrow.
* I think I find sexual comments in Blue's Clues
* Pelvic rest is slowlykilling me.
*My MOM went and saw our friends Brian and Kelly today and I still have to wait until tomorrow after my Dr's appt.
* Still feel like an asshole
* Nobody has bid on my "artwork"yet. It's making me sad since the bidding started at 10 cents. http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=6531567675
* I called Randy on his way home and told him to park in the front of the house b/c the semi was gone.I don't feel bad about it.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Like I Said........

I told you guys.........http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=6531567675

If you didn't think I was crazy before , then .....Well, honestly, I don't know what to tell you.
Heres the proof.

Once again, I'm bored

I'm very very bored today. I've checked everyone's blog at least 4 times, praying that you all have updated. Don't you people know I have nothing to do? At least tomorrow is Sylvia Brown day on Montell. I have something to look forward to.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

14 Kids and Pregnant again....yet again

Ok, so I've watched this show probably every single time it's been on and I'm watching it yet again. I can not help myself. It's like watching a train wreck...................

I've decided the one good thing thats come out of this bed rest thing is that it's Sunday night and I'm home to watch all my Sunday night shows. Family Guy, Intervention, Family Plots, and The L Word. My night is full....
I've even pulled out coloring books.....Let me know if you want me to color you a picture.
Really
I have the time

Happy Mothers Day to all my Bitches

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY, KIDS!!!!! I broke house arrest, um, I mean bed rest today, and we went to lunch with my parents. It was kinda a last minute thing and I wasn't looking so hot, but I didn't even care. IT WAS A CHANCE TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!!!!! My mom, who's a nurse, checked my BP before we left and it was all good. Then, after lunch, we went for a drive and got caught in a hail storm. Randy couldn't see and had to pull over. So just guess where we were?? Right by my work. So we waited it out in the parking lot. Just as we were leaving, everyone started coming out and to check their cars and I ducked.
Nice, huh?
Being on bed rest shouldn't mean that they find you in the parking lot.

Saturday, May 07, 2005

Not pretty

I didn't say it would be pretty..... Heres 28 weeks and 1 day
I was wearing the biggest pair of pajama pants known to man

Bored

I'm very effin' bored people. I have nothing whitty to say. My funny MoJo is gone. I'm going crazy.. And I'm only 2 days into this bedrest thing. This SUCKS! Does anyone have any ideas?



Gracie's sweet little face

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Karma Kicked My Fat Ass Today.

As we were on our way into Omaha today for for Dr's appt ( I dare not see a Dr in this shitty little town) I saw a elderly woman on the side of the interstate, who's car had just broke down, tryin to get someone to stop and help her.I looked at the clock and muttered " oh shit" and kept going. Now, if I wasn't running late or if I didn't happen to be going to a much needed Dr's appt, I would have stopped. But I'm an asshole and kept going. So, we get to the Dr's office and I get weighed. I've only gained 3 pounds, not 6, since my last vist. BP was 144/84. And the baby wasn't moving. After a 30 minute ultrasound with no one talking ( the only sound was me crying quietly) she hooked me up to a fetal monitor and made me eat a sandwich. My blood suger was low. Baby Faith was fine soon after. Then I got the lecture from some nurse with bad breath,who I had never seen before, about how I should always eat before I came in... Blah, blah, blah..... I wasn't trying to starve myself or anything. I just hadn't been hungry. Then I was told that I'm now offically on bedrest. I hate that damn B word. No work, no cooking or cleaning. Up to pee and thats it. Then I was sent to the lab to see Larry, the pathologist, so he could take more of my blood. And I get to do another 24 hr urine test.Everything is depending on the tests. So, I'm wondering - Is Karma kickin my fat ass for not stopping to help that elderly woman earlier today? I think it is. I'm such a asshole.

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

BOB's sister, Slightly Older BOB

So, I've told you all about our next door neighbor, BOB ( bag of bones). Well, we haven't seen her in awhile, but now her sister, Slightly Older BOB is staying there. Randy and I were sitting outside and SOBOB came walking down the street. She stopped on the sidewalk in between the 2 houses and yells over " is this yours?"
I ask her what it is and she says a knife. A KNIFE, PEOPLE! Just laying out there in the grass off the sidewalk. So, I ask her if it was a big one and she said no......then threw it back down and went into her house. Here's What I'm thinking:
1.) Do we look like the kind of people that would play with a knife?
2.) IF we were those kinda people, do we look like we would leave it in front of the house outside the gate, where all the kids could get it?
3.) If YOU found a knife in front of your house would you leave it.
4.) Am I really living in a neighborhood where you can find random shit like that laying around? You would never be able to tell that from looking around.

So, I asked Randy to go pick it up, since a ton of kids walk by here in the morning on their way to school and, duh, it's a knief. I swear the next house we buy will NOT be in this shitty little Iowa town. I'm goin back to Omaha or we're moving to Texas. NO MORE COUNCIL BLUFFS!

I'm gonna deliver this kid myself

So I'm having more issues and I called the Dr. I said I'm spotting again, my BP is up and I've gained another 6 pounds since last Friday.
She said she doesn't see what the problem is and we'll see how things are tomorrow at my Appt. OH, AND THEY'D BE HAPPY TO SET ME UP WITH A SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP ME WITH MY DIET.
WHAT THE FUCK!!!????
Did I not talk to the nurse yesterday and they said that there were signs of change in all the tests that they ran?
Am I really just crazy?
So, Randy came home early today and we went to the hospital to see our friend, Kelly, whos water broke the other day. They think she's crazy too and were gonna send her home. AFTER HER WATER BROKE...AND SHES HAVING TWINS. And SHES 30 WEEKS ALONG. They were admitted by our Dr the other night and weren't impressed( We see the same group of high risk Dr's).
I used to think that our Dr walked on water, now I'm not so sure anymore. Do I need to pass out on the floor, like I did with Grace, before someone takes notice?

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

The Good, The Bad, and Jello Pudding Pops

So many things to tell you.......
THE BAD
**Our good friend Kelly, who is 30 weeks along with twins, water broke last night. The hospital is keeping her, of course. Lets all keep her in our thoughts.
** I got all the test results today from the blood work and the 24 urine test over the weekend. Turns out I'm not crazy. Things are starting to change. Protein in the urine ( more than there was 3 weeks ago). Blood tests show platelets are not where they should be. I was told we will "discuss" our plan of action on Thursday. WOOOHOOOO!!!
****** HERES THE KICKER.....READY? .....Randy was FIRED from his shitty AOL job this afternoon. RANDY.... My husband is the most responsible person I know when it comes to work(Outside of work is a different story). Turns out he accidently changed something in an account that he wasn't supposed. And eventhough he's still in training , they fired him for it ( this is a 3rd party company that is in a contract with AOL - so it's not really AOL. AOL has already pulled out of this company 3 times before and this is there last chance).This makes me laugh. It's like getting fired from Burger King. It's almost to funny to make you mad. Good thing he has a real job during the day.
****Sooooooooooo, If I go on bedrest this week, does this mean we're screwed??? Yes and no. Bills will all be covered, but we won't be going to Texas after Faith is born to see RAndy's family and we might be living off Mac and Cheese for a while...What can you do?

THE GOOD
*** I have the next 2 days off!!!!
***We decided that we're giving notice at Grace's daycare since it's looking like I'll be home more. She only goes 2 days a week anyway.
***Randy started applying for a new shitty part time job last night just to see what was out there.
***********I GET TO SPEND 2 WHOLE NIGHTS WITH MY HUSBAND. YIPPPPPPPYYYY
Am I really this excited? No, I'm on pelvic rest still....Yes, it is killing me. Still happy I get to see Randy, though.

JELLO PUDDING POPS
After a month long hunt, Randy found Jello Pudding Pops for me. I can't even begin to tell you the sheer joy that comes to my mouth when I have 1 ( or 2....they're smller than they used to be). It's like heaven on a stick.......There I go getting all excitied about food again.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

Urine, blood, and speculums-OH MY!

First, I want to thank all you nice people that live in my computer and sent me so many nice emails. I had no idea that people actually read this. So, thanks kids.
Secondly, I'm sorry for not updating on friday. I suck, I know. Things went Ok at the Dr's appt. Baby Faith is looking wonderful. 2.2 ounces and wouldn't stop kicking the Dr while she was doing the ultrasound. The Dr's concerned about the increase in headaches and heartburn. Then there was a 6 pound weight gain in 3 weeks. They've checked everything, and I do mean everything, that they could have, and didn't see where the bleeding came from on Thursday night. They took a ton of blood and had me do a 24 hr urine test AND said no headboard bangin' monkey sex for 2 weeks. That part really sucks. Now, for those of you who have never had to do one of those24 hr urine tests, be thankful. You have to pee in a hat for 24 hrs and then put in a jug take it in. During that 24 hr's you have to keep it on the refrigerator and constantly remind your husband that it's not apple juice. Not the highlight of my weekend. Anyways, then I took it in this afternoon and they took more blood. I'm now on a first name basis with the pathologist, Larry. So, now we wait. I have to go back on Thursday unless they call and want me back sooner. She said she wouldn't put me on bedrest yet, but I need to " rest as much as possible.
And thats what I did this weekend. Lots of sleeping and TV watching. I watched " Meet the Barkers" on MTV like 6 times. It blows my mind they actually paid someone 175,000. to PLAN their wedding. HOLY SHIT, PEOPLE!! I think my whole wedding, everything included, was under 15,000. Somethings just blow my mind. It must be hard to have money. I'd like to try it someday.
Randy's at work now. Bless his little heart, he didn't leave my side this weekend until he had to go to work. He was afraid to help his friend move because he thought I'd go into labor. I hadn't really told him how poopy I'd been feeling, because he's working so much and I don't want him to worry. I heard him on the phone saying to his friend " I didn't know everything that was going on unitl the meeting today". I told him the next " meeting" I have to go to that involves a speculum, you can count me out of. So thats all for now. Since he's gone I'm trying to get some things done around the house and its Sunday, so I have to watch Intervention, Family Plots, and The L Word. And for those of you who asked for a belly shot- It's coming, I promise.
Annie Out